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Bob and Sheri
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6A -10A on 103.3 The Vibe!
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SELFISH GIVING
Thanksgiving has come and gone and the heart of the holiday season is fully upon us. It seems as the years go by, a little big of the magic that seemed infused in the very air during this time, is sucked away by the stress and chaos of this hurry up hustle bustle, holiday. Each year, I promise myself, I'm going to get that magic back. And each year, knowing that a part of that special sparkle manifests in the eyes of my own children...I drag them head log into a number of consumer traditions that borderline on a three ring circus.
Perhaps, that glowing magic will be found at the bottom of a cup of warm steamy hot chocolate. Or...just maybe we will stumble upon it at the end of a light filled street, somewhere between a tacky blow up Santa Claus or behind a glowing candy cane. And every year....as we race from home to home and juggle family visits with present wrapping, Christmas displays with charity drives, school functions and obligations...it seems the rush finally starts to slow, just as we wave good-bye to the season that should give us pause the very most.
At some point in the very grown up lives that creeped up like a caution light to somehow become our own....red cheeks, chapped lips and butterflies fluttering in our tummy's in anticipation of this merry-filled day of cookies and laughter and loved ones, became replaced. In recent years, I have taken Christmas evening to sit cross legged in front our tree - which by this point is usually bordering on a dull shade of nearly dead brown, and bristles decorate our floor....and I just stare in a stunned awe at how quickly it all passes, and ponder why on earth that magic has been lost down the isle ways of local stores or smooched in between like minded crowds of shoppers.
This year I wanted the magic back - and I had a new determination. And the good news is...I think I found it!
In the fashion of "How the Grinch Stole Christmas" please allow me to say here and now...I did not find this in the bottom of a hot chocolate cup. Nor did I find it at the end of a gaudy street filled with colored glowing bulbs. I found it, in line with the bank teller.
Christmas Magic....can be found - standing in line at the bank...and not at all by means of the deposit sitting inside....no no, friends - believe me, I don't even worry of purse theft these days, knowing for certain any such means of robbery would result in an immediate return of my personal property and likely an apology with a receipt of their own....go on and chuckle a little. It seems the boat is shared by larger masses these days, and we're all using a paddle since the gas is too pricey to afford.
No...instead I found this magic, after waiting in a ghastly long line through the drive up window whereupon my patience (little as it is) was tried mightily after wading through a gridlock of cars, running seven deep, and creating a domino effect of "Now Running Late For..." only to feel relief as I edged up to the window, only a single car in front of me now...alllllmoooost there - and whhhhaaaat's this?? The woman ahead of me...is now filling out her bank slips.
We have been waiting in line for over half an hour - and just NOW as she's next in line, does she have pen in hand. This makes the top of my head want to explode but instead, I opt for a bit of fresh air, and soothing relaxation exercises. These don't really work, but sometimes it's nice to feel like I'm faking myself out. As I roll down the window I can hear the exchange in front of me - which lets me know right away, this little lady and her courtesy challenged bank slip readiness....was far from finished, and she had a rant of expletives ready for the teller handling her multiple transactions.
My day had already been horrendous and the headache that was pressing behind my temples was throbbing with a needed Excedrin reminder. Yet, in that instance...I knew that it didn't matter what sort of day I had. This poor bank teller - was taking a mental beating. It must be that way, during so many holidays, when there is such rush and pressure and stress...and where must we turn at some point during our own errand filled days? Usually the bank. Many of times I've been behind someone that had reached the end of their own nerve-rope, and also watched as it was taken out on a teller...or a waitress, or a teacher, or the receptionist at the - fill-in-the-blank. We've all been guilty of it...and as my car inched forward and my...all prepared (thank you very much) transaction was being processed...I knew I had a couple of movie passes swimming in the bottom of my purse. Just as I was finishing up, I fished them out and sent them through the tube with a wave, a smile...and wishes that this poor frazzled teller - would have a good - day.
And you know what?
It felt good.
No....it felt GREAT.
It was just a little bit of a thing. Smaller even that the toys we collect, the boxes we make, the donations we give to local charities during this time of year. Just a little something that I hoped would make her smile and stop for one second and take a moment to realize that ... every now and again - a big piece of magic is born in such a very little tiny thing.
This is a little something that I personally enjoy - and I do it without thinking the entire year through. I didn't realize that's where the magic was, but that day at the bank - it dawned on me...not a slow realization but more like a hammer on the head sort of epiphany. And the feeling that it gives you back - is so good, it's selfish.
There are a number of holiday movies that have become traditional must watch favorites...including Scrogged, starring Bill Murray. There is a monologue he gives, at the end of this movie - that applies so hearilty I must steal a few pieces from it...or least the general idea. This year, I wish you...Christmas Magic.
The sort that you have as a child when everything seems to glow, and the whole world smells like Christmas Trees and Marshmallows. The sort of joy filled heart that makes you laugh a little easier, and keeps you full of the giddy. And I know where you can find it. In little tiny surprises - something small enough that you know you can do it...but sends a message so much bigger. Make it a surprise. Don't expect a thing in return. Just make someones day a little better. Tough times have grown tougher. More is needed in every direction we turn including our own doorsteps. Sometimes it makes it hard to do all that we wish we could....but if you keep it on a smaller scale, it makes spreading around a little piece of "happy" easier.
The check out clerk at the pharmacy down the street from our house, is always so patient and helpful - even when I'm dashing in the store with an arm load of kids, tempers flaring and hands full. This clerk goes out of his way to stay upbeat and remain helpful. So the other day, as I was checking out, after recalling a previous conversation about his favorite candy - I checked out with it, and left it. It felt fabulous walking out the door. While speaking with another mom of school aged children, we discovered a fund raising event had been left in the lurch when another parent came down with the flu....I said not a word (and went right to work, hardy har har) and instead went home crafts in hand....this is a laugh in and of itself as Martha Stewart...I am not - but I sat there, and put each and every twisted bottle cleaner into place, and the next morning, covered them in a box and I dropped them off. They have no idea from where they came or how it was done.
Glorious selfish giving.
Leave a piece of chocolate for your co-worker that's having a crap day. Give an out of the blue Thank-You card to your child's teacher. Bring a cup of coffee to your mailman. Grab soup and make a surprise delivery for the stuffy-filled. Run an extra errand. Be discreet. Make a day. Create a smile.
....So get your Magic this year. Find it in the grin of anyone and everyone...and get selfish for the feeling it gives you. Once it starts - you can't help it, you just crave it, and you want more of it....and it's the best most selfless selfish thing you can do for yourself, and for someone else.
I know where to find the magic...and you should go and get it and get selfish with it too.
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